Her Morning Elegance… and Dreaming about Dreams

This video by Oren Lavie has been watched almost ten million times, so I imagine many of my readers will already be familiar with it. But I just discovered it this morning, and it seemed worthy of passing on.

I am reminded of the passage from the prophet Joel that we used to quote to each other all the time back when I was immersed in charismatic spirituality:

Then afterward I will pour out my spirit upon all mankind. Your sons and daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions; Even upon the servants and the handmaids, in those days, I will pour out my spirit. And I will work wonders in the heavens and on the earth, blood, fire, and columns of smoke; The sun will be turned to darkness, and the moon to blood, At the coming of the Day of the LORD, the great and terrible day.

Okay, so the video is about a young woman sleepwalking, not an old man dreaming dreams. But I’ve never been afraid to reach for a connection. Here’s the question: what dreams are you dreaming? If you hang out at this blog, I suppose that means you are interested in the spiritual life, in some form or fashion. Where are your dreams taking you, spiritually? How does your spiritual practice show up in, or influence, your dreams?

And not just the dreams of sleep, either. When “the young men see visions,” I believe we should assign the most mundane and down-to-earth interpretation to this verse: through the splendor of inspiration, our imagination, our daydreams, and our capacity for wonder and hope and new ideas are all set on fire. As Peter Gabriel sang in his song “Mercy Street” inspired by Anne Sexton: “All of the buildings, all of those cars, were once just a dream in somebody’s head.” So if we take Joel at his word, there’s a level on which the spiritual life is about opening our hearts and souls and minds to the Spirit who will lead us to dream new dreams and envision new possibilities — but then it’s up to us to shake the dreams and visions loose from our heads and to make them real. Hopefully we’re talking about something other than just more buildings and more cars. I dream about people, hundreds of people, thousands, millions, finding joy and meaning and love and connection through silence and rest and community. I dream about us feeding each other and caring for one another and sharing our resources. I dream about songs of prayer and joy and laughter and delight ringing through heaven and earth. I dream about a world where the latest gadgets or the evening stock reports aren’t nearly as interesting as the latest efforts to create green, sustainable technology or the newest initiative to clean our air and our water and to find new ways of relating the human family to the rest of the earth.

What are your dreams? And how do you see those dreams flowing from the safe harbor within you to the world where they can be given to others?

Happy new year, everyone. May 2010 be a year of wonderful dreams come true.

Pandora, Ken Wilber, and William Blake

Ali at Meadowsweet & Myrrh has written a thoughtful and perceptive post in response to my review of Avatar that unfolds out into her own nuanced review of the movie. I would commend this to anyone who reads my blog. Here are my admittedly rambling and random thoughts in response to her articulate writing. Hopefully these thoughts, disjointed as they might be, can stimulate even further reflection and conversation for those who choose to read them.

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Stay Tuned…

Ali at Meadowsweet & Myrrh has written a thoughtful and perceptive response/critique to my review of Avatar that unfolds out into her own nuanced review of the movie. I would commend this to anyone who reads my blog. I don’t have time this morning to write a response to her thoughts (my car is in the shop and I need to pick it up before I go to work), but I’ll do so either tonight or tomorrow, so stay tuned. Meanwhile, here are three quotations that might give you a hint as to where my thoughts are going in regard to Avatar:

The fool who persists in his folly will become wise.

— William Blake

I have one major rule: everybody is right.

— Ken Wilber

Jesus answered and said to them, “Go and report to John what you hear and see: the blind can see and the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up, and the poor receive good news.”

— Matthew 11:4-5

Actual Event or Metaphorical Story?

In response to my review of Avatar, here’s what a reader named Michael asked me:

Hi Carl,
I read your article on the movie “Avatar.”  You wrote that grace is one of the best elements of Christianity.  That statement led me to wonder whether you view the life and death of Jesus as an actual historical event or if you see it more as metaphor for love, sacrifice, etc?  I grew up in a very conservative, evangelical denomination, who would I think say that Jesus is the best element of Christianity.
This is something which I struggle over:  is the atoning work of Jesus an actual event or is it a metaphorical story meant to direct me to God and to grace?
I know that is a big question.  Thank you for any feedback you can give me!

First of all, I certainly hope that no one is going to take potshots at me because I talked about grace but not Jesus in my review. I do know there are some Christians who love nothing more than to point out how other Christians are wrong. I’m not accusing Michael of doing this, but he suggests that the church he grew up in had that kind of culture. And I’ve known churches, and individual Christians, like that as well. Let’s just say for the record that my describing “grace” as characterizing “the best elements in Christianity” was not meant to slight Jesus in any way. In fact, I would trust Jesus to understand that I was writing lyrically and poetically, and not trying to make a hard and fast doctrinal statement.

Now, on to the heart of Michael’s question: “Is the atoning work of Jesus an actual event or is it a metaphorical story meant to direct me to God and to grace?” Forgive me for copping out here, but I simply don’t know. I don’t believe anyone knows. This is the frontier of faith, and we each must decide just where our Kierkegaardian leap will take us. For many people, the leap of faith to believing in the historicity of the Gospel story is both possible and deeply, spiritually satisfying. For many others, that kind of a leap is not possible — but choosing to believe in the story on a metaphorical or mythic level is.

As I said above, many Christians like to point out how other Christians are wrong. So it is certainly tempting for the literalists to attack the mythicists, and vice versa. Meanwhile, as long as we spend time arguing over this, the hungry remain unfed, the naked unclothed, the homeless unsheltered.

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Grace and the Goddess: AVATAR as a Christian/Pagan Parable

James Cameron’s new film, Avatar, tells a story we’ve all heard before; as I commented on Twitter last night, it is Dances with Wolves meets Star Trek: Insurrection, with elements of The Matrix and Whale Rider thrown in. But Avatar is grander and more epic than any of these films, and of course, it’s a stunning achievement of CGI artistry. For its sheer beauty, go see it. But critics are whining that the story is “weak” or “boring” and I think they’re rather justified in their gripes. Nevertheless, I think it raises enough questions for someone like me, interested as I am in the interface between Christianity and indigenous culture, that it’s worth commenting on.

Warning: plot spoilers abound in the rest of this review. Read at your own risk.

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Quote for the Day

If we live by faith we shall judge things very differently from the way people do who rely only on the evidence of their senses and so remain unaware of the priceless treasure hidden under appearances. If we know that someone in disguise is really our king we shall behave very differently toward him than will someone who sees only an ordinary man. He will treat him as such. Now, if we see the will of God in the most trifling affairs, in every misfortune, and in every disaster, we shall accept them all with an equal joy, delight and respect. What others fear and flee from, we shall welcome with open doors. The clothing is shabby and mean to the ordinary eye, but we shall respect the royal majesty hidden under it and feel a deepening of our love the more hidden and abject our king is. … Paradoxically, what we cannot experience by our senses stimulates, increases and enriches our faith. The less we see, the more we believe.

— Jean-Pierre de Caussade, Abandonment to Divine Providence

The Road Goes Ever On and On

“The Road Goes Ever On and On,” or so sings Bilbo Baggins in The Lord of the Rings.

Merry Christmas, everyone. Advent is over. And as is typical for someone working in retail — even monastic retail (!) — for me it was a blur. It was a time of stolen moments of rest and reflection, rather than a truly immersed season of waiting. I leave Advent 2009 behind, still waiting, still waiting for the day, most likely after I retire, when the demands of my work will not compete with the call of the liturgical season.

I know I am not alone in this paradoxical place of waiting for the season of waiting. The key I took from this year’s Advent is my insight that Benedict’s call for monks (and, by extension, monastic lay associates like myself) to live “a continual Lent” can, it seems to me, be expanded to include “a continual Advent.” For aren’t we always in a place of waiting? We wait in line at the Post Office. We wait for traffic to clear up. We wait for a head cold to run its course so we can return to work. We wait for warm weather, and then we wait for cool weather. And on and on it goes.

Perhaps the real message of Advent lies in the invitation to celebrate all those times of waiting. To look for the hidden presence of God in all of our waitings, so that the line at the Post Office is no longer quite so annoying, or the unpleasant weather can be its own source of grace and wonder, enabling us to live in the present moment rather than just waiting our lives away. In other words, waiting is always something that happens in the present, in relation to something anticipated in the future. A prisoner waits for parole. A young lover waits to hear from his or her beloved. An elderly man like my father waits to die, not with morbidity or desperation, but with a serenity and placidity that I find both amazing and  inspiring. Advent, I believe, teaches us to celebrate the gift of the present in the waiting-for-the-future. It doesn’t take away the power and the promise that the future holds. But it reminds us that, in a very real way, the present is all we have. We are always impoverished, and a sign of our poverty is our lack of ownership of either the past or the future. And of course, there is profound grace in this.

So while I am waiting for the Advent when I no longer have to work long hours and weekends, I am invited to celebrate each messy imperfect Advent that I am given. But not now. Now I am invited to celebrate the messy imperfect Christmas season that is now upon us.

And so are you.

Happy Christmas, and thanks for reading.

The Places that Scare You

The American Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön has written a book called The Places that Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times. I haven’t read it yet, although I like her work and so I hope to one of these days; but I’m mentioning it because the title alone is, for me, provocative. Sooner or later meditation or contemplation alone will take us to the places that scare us. Indeed, life will take us to the places that scare us. We lose a job, a relationship, a valued possession, our health. Worse than our own suffering is the suffering of those we love. And when loved ones die, or leave in any other way, a huge hole can emerge in our lives that seemingly nothing will fill. The Buddha very rightly noted in the first of his Four Noble Truths that suffering happens. Birth, aging, illness, death, clinging, separation, and other aspects of life all bring us to suffering. And no one likes to suffer, and so the places that scare us (or perhaps I should say, the places that scare me) are those places where suffering will possibly or probably or most certainly will come to me.

Since both Benedictine and Celtic spirituality are all about hospitality, I suppose the obvious question here is, how do we offer hospitality to our suffering, and to the places that scare us? I’m not sure I buy into Chödrön’s subtitle: is “fearlessness” really on the menu? Granted, Jesus told us to be not afraid; he also told us to be perfect (in that context he was talking specifically about loving those who do evil). I’m currently reading The Teaching of the 12, Tony Jones’ commentary on the Didache, and he sees in that ancient manuscript this kind of Gospel-inspired commitment to loving acceptance of even those persons we are tempted to hold in judgment. The Gospel is all about busting through judgment and judgmentalism and embracing radically those even whose actions or behaviors we find scandalous. I don’t know about you, but I’m not there yet. Just like I’m not to fearlessness yet. It seems to me that before we can be fearless or perfect in our love, we have to grow into it. And moving into the places that scare us, and accepting the fact that we are very much afraid, and by the grace of God, doing it anyway, is an important first step. Again by the grace of God, the fearlessness will come, later. But if we wait for fearlessness before we go to the places that scare us, we will probably just wind up immobilized.

I’ve been thinking about all this a lot lately, not only because I’m playing with the question of “tame spirituality” vis-a-vis “wild spirituality,” but also because I’m having a hard time settling on what my next book project should be. Basically, I have three options: should I explore mysticism again, or should I turn my focus back to something more Celtic, or should I write about my transition from Paganism to Catholicism? Guess which of the three scares me the most (simply because it is the closest to my own heart)? Why, though, should my own story scare me? Because of all the pitfalls I see along the way. I’m afraid that I will share too much of my own shadow, or that I will project too much of my own shadow onto either Paganism or Catholicism. I’m afraid that, in an effort to avoid the pitfall of projection, that I will retreat from being honest in talking about my experiences both as a Pagan or as a Catholic. In other words, to write my story, I must be fearlessly honest about myself, but also about all my experience, both in Pagan or in Christian circles. Such fearless confessional writing is different from the rather journalistic task of celebrating mysticism. And I fear that I am not strong enough or good enough to rise to the challenge that such a task presents to me.

Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway, says Susan Jeffers. And I agree with her. Sit in the middle of the fear, and breathe through it. We know we are alive when we go into the places that scare us, not to prove how macho we are, but simply to practice that hospitality that can give birth to true fearlessness. But knowing all this doesn’t make it any less scary going in. There’s another book out there that I’ve never read; it’s called The Courage to Write: How Writers Transcend Fear. I don’t know about other writers, but I deal with fear as a writer by bludgeoning my way through it. “Transcending” fear is a fine art that I have yet to master.

Maybe the reason why this blog strikes at least one reader as tame is because I’ve been shying away from the stuff that scares me. I suppose now that this is on my radar screen I need to do something about it. And I will, as soon as my hands stop shaking. :-)

The Right Way and the Wrong Way

In response to my comments about the forthcoming Catholic Prayer Bible: Lectio Divina Edition, where I complained because the ad for this Bible suggested that lectio divina culminates in “action” rather then “contemplation” (see Lectio Divina as a Tool for… Creating an Action Plan?!?), a Facebook friend of mine who is a Catholic author says the following:

I read your blog comments on the Paulist Press Lectio Divina Bible. I agree absolutely with you that contemplatio does not equal action, and that contemplation is an important element in lectio divina. However, I would not agree that lectio divina necessarily has four steps as described by Guigo II in the medieval work, The Monk’s Ladder. My writing advocates a broader and more ancient understanding of lectio divina that predates the four steps of Guigo II and offers a critique of Guigo II.

He’s going to send me a copy of his book (published by a reputable Catholic press), and after I take a look at it I’ll blog about it here. In the meantime, I thought it was worth commenting on the fact that all of our spiritual practices — not just lectio, not just meditation, not just contemplation — can take a variety of forms.

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Watching the Woodstock Movie (Again)

This weekend I saw the recently released “ultimate collector’s edition” director’s cut of the Woodstock Movie (available on DVD and Blu-Ray). This was the third time I saw the movie; I originally saw it in the theater back in the late seventies, and then watched it on VHS sometime in the late 80s or early 90s. But the ultimate collector’s/director’s cut has about two hours of footage not featured in the theatrical release, including Jefferson Airplane, Grateful Dead, Creedence Clearwater Revival, plus additional footage from the Who and Jimi Hendrix.

Having been too young to go to Woodstock (I was 8 at the time, I suppose I could have gone if someone took me, but obviously, that didn’t happen), the movie has been the heart of my understanding of Woodstock. When I saw the movie in the 70s, it was like a revelation to me: my first real introduction to so many musicians I would come to love: Joan Baez, Crosby Stills & Nash, Arlo Guthrie, Janis Joplin, and of course Jimi Hendrix. Seeing it on VHS a decade or so later just anchored my sense that Woodstock was a watershed event, both artistically and socio-politically.

What a difference an extra twenty years makes.

Don’t get me wrong; I haven’t gone all right-wing in regard to Woodstock. But I think the perspectives of age, of being a veteran of plenty of Pagan gatherings, and of considering Ken Wilber’s critique of “boomeritis,” all have given me perhaps a more balanced view of the festival. Watching the movie this time, I was struck by a number of things I hadn’t noticed before. Kids jumping the fence to get in, before the concert was declared “free.” The arrogant idealism, that suggested hippies and stoners were really going to change the world. The almost total lack of non-white people (except on the stage, but even then, Sly Stone and Jimi Hendrix were the exceptions). The liberal use of completely gratuitous vulgar language (for example, the Intermission card read “Interf***ingmission”). The kindness and tolerance (for the most part) of the townspeople and neighbors, all of whom were massively inconvenienced by the event. The fact that the army, the national guard and others were flying in food and medical supplies — economic realities that never seemed to be factored in to the “Woodstock Nation’s” smug insistence that they had a better way of living than the society at large. And of course, the huge garbage-dump that Max Yasgur’s farm became at the end of the festival.

The key word here is balance. I still think the Vietnam war was a horrible misstep; it is impossible to understand the 60s counterculture without considering the draft and the absurdity of that war as key factors contributing to its rise. The Hog Farm giving away food and the innocence of the skinny-dippers and the mud-sliders are all sweet to consider, even now. And the overall peace and love vibe, naive though it may have been, still seems to me a far better orientation of the mind than the cynicism that has reigned in our country pretty much ever since a certain president from California broke the law (less than four years after Woodstock), an existential malaise that only deepened when another Californian was elected president in 1980.

So I’m writing all this not to say sour grapes on Woodstock, or on my own youthful idealism, but to ponder how we can re-envision some of that hopeful idealism and commitment to gently transforming the world… only without gate-crashing and ignoring the contribution of all the “squares”?

Now, as for the music. What really struck me is how young everybody looked. And they were young — most of the A-list rock and rollers I mentioned above were all in their 20s when performing at Woodstock. Grateful Dead’s Pigpen, Janis and Jimi were all fated to die within a few years. Roger Daltrey oozes eros, and Joan Baez, dignified and reserved, exudes a maternal warmth (she was pregnant at the time). Grace Slick looks exhausted (scheduled to take the stage hours earlier, Jefferson Airplane was up all night and played at dawn). The guitar playing is phenomenal, of course, with memorable performances from Pete  Townshend, Carlos Santana, Jorma Kaukonen, Jimi Hendrix (naturally) and Jerry Garcia (in an otherwise less-than-stellar 35-minute workout of “Turn on Your Lovelight”). Crosby, Stills & Nash and Arlo Guthrie were pretty sweet, and Joe Cocker — weird air-guitar-ish hand gestures on full display — was truly a joy to hear. John Sebastian was embarrassingly stoned. And on it goes. So if my sense of Woodstock’s politics may have changed with the passage of time, I remain as entranced as ever with the music, only now I am even more impressed because I see just how young those kids were when they played there. Really, really wonderful.

So watching the Woodstock movie again, I am reminded what the members of Grateful Dead used to say, impatiently, when journalists would ask them about the rampant drug use among their fans: “We’re about the music.” And I think Woodstock, far more than the politics of the anti-war movement or the idealism of the Hog Farm or the free love vibe of the hippies (which Hugh Hefner blatantly twisted to his own ends, as documented on the included bonus disc), is really all about the music. And what wonderful music it was.

One final gripe about the “ultimate collector’s edition” Blu-Ray and DVD: both come with all sorts of unnecessary extra packaging: an iron-on patch (as if we’re all still wearing denim jackets), a lucite paper-weight thingy, a mini-reproduction of the Life magazine that dealt with Woodstock, etc. What a waste. It reminds me of the stark ending of the movie, with its apocalyptic survey of the tons of left-behind garbage. Our generation really is pretty pathetic when it comes to paying lip service to environmental issues but then greedily consuming resources for the purpose of acquiring more disposable trinkets. I’m just saying.

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